If you go back and look at this blog from the beginning until now, you will say, "wow, Christine is not normal, she's certifiably CrAzY!". We have planned and deliberated back and forth, back and forth. Here is an update from crazy town.

Liberia: We have not spoken to Sundayma in 6 weeks. We have not been able to get in contact with her, but have spoken briefly with the woman who takes care of her. Things are getting a bit muddy there and we don't see anything happening anytime soon. There will be a change in political offices in October and this may or may not be in our favor. We just have to wait. We have considered moving there temporarily, building an orphanage there, and visiting there. All of these doors seem to be closing right now.

Adopting Domestically: We are working with an agency in Florida to adopt an infant, but again we just have to wait. They have all of our paperwork and when/if a family chooses us they will call us.

A NEW door! We have also been looking into adopting from the foster care system. Because of the ages of our kids we are cautious with what we are considering and what we are capable of offering. Every thing we have inquired about has so far not worked out.

We also are in the process of starting the non-profit. The Refuge. We had the intention of using this to build in Liberia, but now are questioning that. God is always our Refuge and we are exploring several options of how we can walk hand in hand with Him in providing Refuge for orphans domestically and internationally.

We know that someday we may walk away from all of this. We also know that we will look back and say, "wow, God's timing really is perfect. We learned so much about yourselves, God's word and who He wants us to be!" We just found out Shaun probably has asthma. He has to use a nebulizer twice a day for 15 minutes until we get some answers. I was just thinking I sure am glad we don't have a baby yet. I am home schooling all 3 of the girls this fall and starting some kindergarten with Hailey while Shaun soaks it all in! I'm excited and definitely a little nervous. Our lives are constantly evolving and I trust 100% that God has everything under control.

We aren't the type to sit around. Just because God has everything under control doesn't mean we sit and wait for something to show up on our doorstep. We have to be active in knocking and seeking. We are open to anything, we are pursuing everything cautiously and prayerfully. Please continue to keep our journey in your prayers. One day we will all look back at this blog and will be awe struck by the amazing things God has done!

Just in case you were wondering...

I have nothing profound to say, like a normally do! I'm just hanging around pretending life is normal. Forcing my self to focus on the regular day to day things. I'm home schooling Madalyn and Lia. I also just started Hooked on Phonics with my baby genius Hailey. Shaun hangs around and picks some stuff up. He learns better when it's not directed at him. Samantha refuses to give into the dark side and become a home school dork! Yes, we hang out in our pajamas until noon, and act a little strange, but we get to go ice skating, sledding, and hiking in the middle of the day! Oh well, I love who she is.

I am patiently waiting. We made some progress with Sunny and now we are at a stand still. We are praying about Jason going there. The good news is we got our international approval for 2 girls between the ages of 6 and 12! Yes, I said 2 girls. We are not quite sure who the second little girl is, but we know she's going to be Lia's best friend. I think we will wait to make a decision on that until Jason goes.

It is so hard to know what God is telling us to do. As I posted before we decided we were going to wait on a baby. Our reason was because financially traveling to see Sunny and adopting domestically was too much. The woman from the agency in Florida called and wanted to know where we were in the process. We prayed about it and decided if the door is open we should walk through. So now we are in this huge hall with a million doors that aren't open yet. We aren't alone in the hall and we are grateful for that.

Jason's biggest struggle is always trusting God financially, mine is letting God drive. I do NOT like sitting in the back seat. I like to be in charge. There's a lot you can learn about yourself when you're hanging out in the hall! We don't have any idea what is going to happen or when. We could have 8 kids next month. It could be a year or two years.

"FOR I KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU DECLARES THE LORD. PLANS TO PROSPER YOU AND NOT TO HARM YOU. PLANS FOR A HOPE AND A FUTURE! Jeremiah 29:11

PEACE.

This is hands down my favorite picture of Sunny. She has this sweet, little sassy face that reminds me of Samantha. It's the face of a lover and a fighter all in one tiny package. I love her. It also saddens me to look around the picture. When is the last time your kids ate on a dirty concrete floor out of a shared bowl. It reminds me of who she is, where she's coming from and the strength God has given her inside to grow into an incredible young lady!

Philippians 4:6-7

⁶ Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

I'm some what of a planner. Ha! I've got issues. When we decided we were going to try and adopt an infant as well as Sundayma, I had to almost physically restrain myself. I wanted to go buy car seats, and clothes, and diapers. I wanted to rearrange bedrooms. I didn't. I asked God if this was really supposed to happen right now that it would be so clear to us. I couldn't quite get excited, but I knew Jason said yes, and we were filling out the paper work. I did slip and buy a few things! But like I said God was going to show us.

Well last night Jason came home and we were talking about Sundayma. This heavy, deep longing we have for her is always a part of our day. This time was a little different. The subject of one of us going had been thrown around and Madalyn really wanted to go. Like I would let my 11 year old go to Africa, I don't think so. When the idea was presented of Jason going and taking Madalyn I just said yes, you both need to go soon. They are sisters and they need to see each other. Did I just saw that out loud???

Then the catch. If we are going to buy 2 plane tickets to Liberia. We are not going to be able to put money away for a baby. Ok, what just happened here? What happened is I opened that door. I simply said "God, please show us what you have for us. If we are supposed to get a baby, make it clear". He made it clear. Does this mean no baby? Heck no! It means we are only 30 and God has the perfect little baby for us. Just not yet. He has chosen Sundayma for our family right now and we have to do everything in our power to get her home safely. He will do the rest.

I am completely filled with peace. No second thoughts. I know what needs to be done. I know my big hearted, yet spoiled daughter needs to see true poverty, true sickness, true fear. I know my husband is an incredible father and Sunny needs to know him. I know he has such kindness and patience towards people he will make some progress in our paper work in Liberia. Above all I know I serve a mighty God who has promised me He will protect Sunny and rescue her.

We need you to come along with us on this journey to cover our family and Sunny and someday baby Titus in your prayers!

Blessed Beyond Measure,

The Youngs

This weekend is going to be full of family time, BIG surprises for our kids, quiet time remembering the greatest gift of all and a little sadness.

There is a stocking hanging above our wood stove that will remain untouched. There is a place in all of our hearts that will be empty tomorrow morning. We will remember God's perfect timing and be covered in His peace and for that we will rejoice.

Jason has always made fun of me for having extra stockings. I always tell him just wait we are going to use them all someday. One is now filled with all kinds of boy things for Shaun. One has a shiny S for a little girl in Liberia and last but not least one says Titus and has onesies and blankets with tiny cars on them. We are waiting with great anticipation for a call saying we have been chosen by a birth mother. Our Christmas is about so much more this year. Our greatest gift won't be material, but the love that we have in our hearts for our two babies we haven't even met yet!!

Merry Christmas Sundayma and someday soon baby Titus!!

Adoption Breaks the Heart of God.

I listened to a message a while back about adoption. The woman opened with the line "adoption breaks the heart of God." I was kind of taken back. Why would adoption break God's heart? He adopted us. Giving homes to orphans, isn't that what he told us to do? I didn't get it. I'm really not sure I heard anything else she said.

I understand now. There is a song by Lincoln Brewster that says "surely children weren't made for the street and fathers were not meant to leave. Surely this isn't how it should be". That's it. This is not how it's supposed to be. Adoption breaks the heart of God, because adoption is the result of our sinful nature. Some foolish, some intentional, some violent and hideous.

The world of adoption is a whole new place. You can't truly understand it until you are fully immersed in it. I don't say that self righteously. I've been outside this world and judged, stared and pointed fingers. Now I live in that world. There are so many facets to this world. There are healthy, happy babies, there are terrified toddlers, angry kids, abused kids. They all have different stories. Different hurt at different times.

I see the fear in the eyes of my sweet little boy. I don't think he even knows why he's afraid. Deep in his soul he's terrified though. He's been abandoned before. I believe God is healing his little heart every day. It breaks God's heart that he is afraid, that it took him a year to trust us. It breaks God heart that his mother must look at his pictures and feel so lost without him.

It breaks God's heart that my daughter in Africa has never known the love of a mother and father. Her life has no value to so many people. I pray everyday that she knows she is loved by her heavenly father, valued as a princess in his eternal kingdom. That her heart will be filled by Him.

So, yes adoption breaks the heart of God. I believe our family is being obedient doing a miniscule thing in this huge world of sin. He is mending broken hearts through us. He has allowed four crazy girls to love Shaun unconditionally, he has allowed Madalyn to slowly build a sisterhood with Sundayma. But the circumstances of how they became a part of our family break his heart. I hope that in our blind faith we will Glorify His name!

SO THANKFUL

One year ago, maybe less I wasn't innocent. Probably oblivious to the world. I have 5 healthy kids, a hard working husband who loves me in spite of me, and 2 fluffy dogs! Yes, I was well aware of poverty, violence, and sickness, but it was very far away.

Last year at this time I never knew a child who was fighting for her life, had lost all her hair, but not her fight. I had parents who were going to be married forever. I never worried about my little granny. I never knew someone who had been a victim of horrible domestic violence. I never knew a child personally who had been raped and suffered her whole life at the hands of those who saw her as worthless. I am a new person. A new person with horrible images in my head, sadness in my heart, and hope for the future.

It's easy to never doubt God when you have no reason to. When your life is a little fairy tale story book of course God is real. But when you have to look at a sick child screaming it makes you wonder a bit. When a stranger becomes your daughter, but you can't even touch her or protect her, that faith begins to waiver. When your holidays and birthdays have to be split between your parents, you get angry at God. But all of the sudden you really need God. He has to be real or you can't face reality.

He has to be real for Ella, or she wouldn't still be fighting. He has to be real for Jeanna or she wouldn't have been able to truly walk away. He has to be really for Sundayma or she would have curled up in a ball and died. He has to be real to heal the hearts of my family. I am trusting more than ever and I am grateful reality came and busted up my fairy tale.

I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving and a second helping of reality. Reality of the hunger, violence and sickness the world faces. Reality of who God is and what he's done for you. Reality of the hunger, violence and sickness the world faces.

I don't even like roller coasters...

Why you ask? Why don't I like roller coasters? Well, I don't like waiting. I don't like standing in that line while the anticipation wells up like a home made volcano about to blow. I don't like hoping that the safety harness is going to hold me in my seat. And I really don't like my body being whipped all over the place and my stomach ending up in my throat. Up and down, jerking this way and that. Yes, there is definitely some excitement along the way. But I'd really rather just stick to the merry-go-round. It's safe there. I know exactly what's going to happen and I'm not going to get sick!
So guess where life throws me? Yes, the roller coaster. The roller coaster named adoption, Africa. I am waiting in that line, being tossed to and fro. I am in love with this little girl, every day I envision her sitting next to me in church, laughing in the back seat of the car, sleeping safely in her bed. Then I hear the government and the laws are changing, she's sick and not getting better. This is the scariest emotional roller coaster I've ever been on. But I'm on, I'm committed, I'm not going to be the one who says "wait I want to get off". Even if I wanted to I couldn't.
When all is said and done I know that God will be glorified. When I step out of my seat and set my wobbly self on the ground, I hope you will all know I didn't do it alone. With Him all things are possible.